“And the four living creatures, each of them with six wings, are full of eyes all around and within, and day and night they never cease to say, “Holy, holy, holy, is the Lord God Almighty, who was and is and is to come!” Revelations 4:8 ESV
Dear Heavenly Father – You are the One True God. Beside you there is no other. I acknowledge your Lordship over my life. I praise and thank you for all you have done! Please help me as I search myself to see if there is any ways within me to repent of. In the name of Jesus – Amen
Tomorrow at sunset is Rosh Hashanah, the Jewish New Year! And if you have been flowing – it is a time of reflection, repentance and praise. I have been obedient to the principles – but I must be honest, the attacks and life struggles that are up against me right now have me out of sorts, and especially struggling with this task.
Today’s task is to think about all the things He has done and praise and worship Him for it. So I pulled out my notebooks with all my Bible studies and flipped through them. Then when I started posting them here – I switched and skimmed through these posts as well.
I do see the Lords hand!! But I also see all the unanswered prayers. Prayers that are heavy on my heart. Things that I need, and do not have (I must not need them). People I desperately want to see in eternity choosing the ways of this world and not the ways of God. My own child, rejecting me and God. Not to mention how the enemy is coming against me. A year ago, I felt the world had turn against me and I was attacked from all sides – throughout this year I have felt the world has turn against me and I am attacked from all sides – and now I feel exactly how one would expect to feel after a year of being beat up from all sides. It seems even little prayers go without a response or a ‘no’. People ask me to pray and I almost want to say – ask someone else who has an effective prayer life. My prayer life seems to be getting by because of the prayers of my prayer partner. (I thank God for her, every day. Everyone needs someone who will pray in agreement with them!)
“So that by two unchangeable things, in which it is impossible for God to lie, we who have fled for refuge might have strong encouragement to hold fast to the hope set before us.” Hebrews 6:18 ESV
Don’t worry about me, though – I am holding fast to the hope. God cannot lie. I may be struggling in faith – but since I am struggling there is obviously still faith! Amen?! And I am still holding on.
Every single prayer has a verse attached showing me how to pray the will of God. I am quoting those verses. I have my promises even though I am tired and do not see with my physical eyes and my spiritual eyes are all blurry from weeping. Weeping which causes my prayers to be all jumbled, both when I pray in English and when I pray in the spirit.
“But Jesus looked at them and said, “With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.” Matthew 19:26 ESV
“Jesus looked at them and said, “With man it is impossible, but not with God. For all things are possible with God.” Mark 10:27 ESV
“For nothing will be impossible with God.” Luke 1:37 ESV
I think God really wanted us to know this – Nothing is impossible for Him – All things ARE possible for Him. And He has even extended this amazing gift of possibilities to us!
“I can do all things through him who strengthens me.” Philippians 4:13 ESV
So, I can wait on the Lord. This past year has been a time of waiting, persevering, begging even, and crying out to God. A year of growth and work – foundational work.
Lord change this situation – and slowly He has changed me. Lord save my friends and family, and slowly He has changed me. Lord, bring back the prodigals, and well – He did bring me back.
My brother and I were talking about that last night – in the eyes of adults around me (when I was growing up) they thought I was a rebellious, lost cause. And God took this unruly, ‘learning disabled’, neuro-a-typical, mess that no one thought could learn and turned her into a student of the word of God. Look what the Lord has done. What was impossible in man’s eyes – yet here I am reading, studying, and writing it all down.
“‘Ah, Lord God! It is you who have made the heavens and the earth by your great power and by your outstretched arm! Nothing is too hard for you.” Jeremiah 32:17 ESV
So pray the impossible prayers – pray them for a full year as I have – and pray them for longer if that is what it takes! Send a great awakening, Lord – Shake us, wake us, and set us loose in your power!
“If we are faithless, he remains faithful— for he cannot deny himself.” 2 Timothy 2:13 ESV
And He won’t leave us faithless. He will bring encouragement in renew us.
“but they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint.” Isaiah 40:31 ESV
Oh Lord, why have I grown weary? What lesson should I learn to prevent it? But I praise you and thank you for the word, the truth, which encourages me so I can renew my strength.
“Oh, the depth of the riches and wisdom and knowledge of God! How unsearchable are his judgments and how inscrutable his ways!” Romans 11:33 ESV
If the last 12 months had a theme, besides “wild unexpected craziness”, besides being locked in and waiting, besides working on building firm foundations and repairing broken foundations – which all seem like very universal themes. I think it is a greater lesson:
“For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, declares the Lord. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.” Isaiah 55:8-9 ESV
And these past 12 months, God has been in control – and He will continue to be in control – these are His ways.
What can God do? Well, every time I went to Him (every day, any time or as many times, sometimes, second by second – EVERY time) God gave me exactly what I needed at that moment and enough grace for the day – God’s grace has been enough and will be enough. God is sufficient for me.
As Adam was created to be dependent on the Lord (and in and through that dependency He had complete freedom), we too are being drained of all of our ‘self-reliance’ and are developing a ‘God-reliance’ and therefore He is becoming more and more glorified in us. As the year progressed, the subjects my yet unanswered prayers have become more and more hopelessly impossible – and oddly this brings me great encouragement (when I reason with a sound mind and not the emotions of a beat up child). My God is powerful, unfailing, and faithful – He cannot lie. And now when things change, we will not be able to say it was man’s doing and we will not be able to say it was coincidence. God will be glorified.
Am I committed to continue – even if I never see (here on earth) the answers to my prayers? Yes. As long as God is glorified.
Continue to read, continue to pray, and continue to believe against all odds. Relationships can be hard work, especially when I am involved! I am a fallible, feeble, weak, fleshly human – so my side of the relationship needs much work. But God is solid and unstoppable. His side is firm; and as I struggle, He mercifully offers grace and secures me.
As I said near the beginning of this blog (and say again today), I cannot wait to tell you of the great things the Lord has done and announce my friends’ and families’ turn to God. I cannot wait to announce when my needs are met. I can’t wait to testify that the attacks no longer penetrate my armor and together – let us study and build a better and stronger armor out of more Bible understanding.
If you don’t already, and today you would like to have a relationship with a God who can communicate with you and be part of your life (and protect you) – one who is full of mighty power and tender love, then please know that I have put the “A, B, C’s of Salvation” in my introduction. Please click here to follow the link.**
Thank you for reading ~ Grace be with you
Be healthy and blessed ~ I love you and love one another
Watch and Pray ~ Seek God & keep your eyes on Jesus!
Maranatha ~ Come Lord Jesus!